During my first pregnancy I experienced many
first time mom anxieties. It’s a new, life changing experience – I think it’s
only natural that such fears arise. “Will I feed the baby enough? Love the baby
enough? Raise her to be a kind human being?” As Remy gets older different fears
keep me awake at night, “Are we reading to her enough? Offering enough
stimulating activities? Putting enough sunscreen on?” I’m starting to think
that parents will never really leave this constant state of worrying.

Now that we’ll be adding a new addition to the
family I’ve started suffering from a whole slew of new anxieties. I thought it
would be therapeutic, and maybe even helpful, to share those fears here on the
blog in case other soon-to-be mothers of two were going through the same type
of constant state of apprehension. If so, please leave any fears you may be
facing in the comments below! It’s nice to know that we’re not in this alone!

I think
my biggest fear is whether or not Remy will feel unloved by me when Baby Boy
Mason arrives. I’ll be his main source of sustenance so any
alone time with Remy will be limited. I really want to carve out time during
the first few months of adjustment for just me and my main girl. I know it’s
going to be difficult but I don’t want her to feel isolated from the
relationship that we’ve built.

I fear
that I won’t cherish those newborn months as much as I did the first time
around. Been there done that syndrome, you know. From hand-me-downs
to not getting photographed as much as the firstborn, I don’t want Baby Boy to
not get that special attention, too. I want to experience those ‘firsts’ with
him and be as excited, if not more excited, than I was with Remy.

I lie
awake at night thinking that Remy will resent her little brother. Plugging
back to my first fear, I’m scared Remy might feel a certain kind of way with
her little brother. I kind of suffered from this with my younger sister and don’t
want Remy to cut off that bond the way I did. She hasn’t shown signs of this, on
the other hand she’s excited and already constantly says she loves him, but it’s
still an anxiety I have.

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In case you’re interested, here’s a post from
last year on my thoughts regarding having a second baby.

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