Wardrobe Diaries

True Life

True life: I’m failing at blogging. Well I don’t know if I would necessarily say failing but I’m not succeeding, that’s for sure. I’ve had a bout of resentful feeling towards blogging lately – the competition, the comparison, the fakeness and need to always be ‘on’. It all takes a toll. I recently wrote a long, wordy post about how blogging has become a clique-y, ‘look at me’, so-called community but then decided against publishing. Why? Because I didn’t hold back. I called bloggers out, PR companies, brands, and blogging ‘communities’ that showcase the same bloggers by name. However I realized that that wouldn’t be nice or graceful thing to do. In the end of it all I was mad at myself for not being as dedicated to the hustle as I once was. But if I think of it, even when I was at the top of my game I wasn’t getting the same exposure as some of the bloggers in my class. It makes me wonder, what I am I doing wrong differently? I don’t know, I don’t mean to be bitching but I just gotta vent.

I’d like to close this post with a lesson learned at bible study last week. When I feel jealous of someone, I need to realize that I’m not equipped to handle what they have. I’m only equipped to handle what God has given me.