While I reflect on this last year of parenting I can confidently say that I learned a lot within this last year, but I can with even more confidence say that I still have a ton to learn. I expect that in parenting every year will bring new challenges and new learning experiences and I am eager to learn what works for us and what doesn’t.
Becoming Remy’s mother has changed me, the person I am, for the better. Because I now have to care for someone elses well-being I’ve learned to be a little less selfish and a little more empathetic, a little less stand-offish and a little more expressive. I know that I will be kissing a lot more booboo’s along the way, that I’ll be dishing out a lot of ‘because mommy said so’s,’ and that I will not always be the good guy. But I’m okay with all of it and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
In this last year I also realized that while women become mothers almost the instant they become pregnant, men don’t become fathers until months after the baby is born. For those first few months there was not much of a connection between Remy and Kevin. I was her everything – her nourishment, her favored spot for naps, her personal butler (which I was perfectly fine with). Kevin on the hand helped where he could and was such a trooper when she fussed if she wasn’t in my arms, but I could see that his feelings were hurt when she whined for my comfort versus his. However now, months later, those two share this unspeakable bond. He fills a certain portion of her heart that I never will fill – that of her fearless, comforting daddy. She falls asleep in his arms within minutes, lights up and yells ‘dada’ when he comes home, and enjoys watching ESPN with daddy in the loft, both shirtless staring at the screen like zombies. It melts my heart every single time.
So for this next year I just want us to grow as a family, as well as grow individually in our roles as parents. Remy has been such a great blessing to both Kevin and I and has taught us to be better people. Could I guess what this next year has in store for us? I don’t really have a clue but I’m excited and ready for the adventure!